Meredith Gaudreau Says Hockey Season Is 'Hard' After Johnny's Death

Hockey season isn’t the same for Meredith Gaudreau after the tragic death of late husband Johnny Gaudreau.

“It’s been really hard watching hockey start up and seeing how different my life is now,” Meredith wrote via Instagram on Friday, September 20, alongside an old video interview featuring Johnny. “My whole life was taking care of John and our kids. It’s all I ever wanted.”

The couple shared daughter Noa, 23 months, and son Johnny, 6 months. Meredith revealed during Johnny’s recent memorial service that she is currently expecting baby No. 3. In her post, Meredith added the only bright side is that she gets to see her late husband be honored every day by his friend and teammate Sean Monahan.

Johnny and Monahan, 29, played for the Calgary Flames together. Johnny later joined the Columbus Blue Jackets. The pair were going to be reunited this year after Monahan signed with the Blue Jackets during the offseason.

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“But watching Sean wear CBJ is something I know John always always wanted,” she continued. “Noa loves cheering for Uncle Sean too. Wishing 23 a good training camp and can’t wait to cheer you on .”

Earlier on Friday, Meredith opened up about how she was having a “hard time” ahead of Noa’s upcoming 2nd birthday.

“She loves watching videos of daddy before bed especially her requests for ‘daddy hockey’ which led me to these videos,” she captioned another interview Johnny did talking about his family. “She loves watching him play and cheering for him through the screen. His biggest fan.”

She continued: “They loved each other so much. She even has the same freckle as him on her right cheek. And as she approaches turning 2 I have been told their personalities are getting to be more and more similar and I can’t wait for that to continue.”

While watching the videos back, Meredith shared that she felt so “thankful” for her “perfect husband.”

“To be honest I never once didn’t feel like the luckiest most grateful girl in the world since the day I met him,” she continued. “Videos like this is why. I love you so much John. Thank you for being the perfect husband.”

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In August, Johnny and his brother, Matthew Gaudreau, were struck and killed while riding their bikes in Oldmans Township, New Jersey. Johnny was 31, while Matthew was 29. Us Weekly confirmed that the hockey players were hit by Sean M. Higgins, who was arrested and charged with two counts of vehicular homicide. He is suspected of being drunk at the time of the incident.

Matthew and Johnny were set to be groomsmen in their sister Katie Gaudreau’s wedding, which was scheduled to take place the day after the accident. The nuptials were postponed in the wake of the tragedy.